Wednesday, May 24, 2006

The making of the May 2006 bin Laden tape.

The following, of course, is fiction:

Maryland, USA.

General X - The April tape hasn't done wonders for the President. This time, can we have Osama mentioning virgins or something?

General Z - Is this a joke about Bush?

General X - How about getting a top actor to play Osama? Perry Mason? James Mason?

General Z - How many masons does it take to....?

General X - It's a secret.

General X - What are our aims for this new tape?

Colonel Y - Zacarias Moussaoui says he lied in admitting involvement in 9 11. We'll get Osama to confirm that. Makes Osama sound authentic and accurate. Also, Osama can say some of the Guantanamo people are innocent. He's not giving away any great secrets.

General Z - More folks are beginning to doubt our story about Arab hijackers.

Colonel Y - Osama will say he personally chose the hijackers.

General X - My kid says the Afghan children are no different from American children.

General Z - You mean they just sit around and get bombed.


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